Matter of remarriage or not after demise of spouse


God is love! If I am made in His image, then loving must be my attribute, unless I refuse to acknowledge my new creation reality. So, of necessity, I am love. I am not to try to love because His love has been shed abroad in my heart by the Holy Spirit. It is part of the redemption package. It’s a restoration reality.

However, without revelation, this is usually a big deal to a believer and a child of God. But this love is so much about agape love. I personally think it is the source of all other types of love, whether the good or the bad and the ugly. Yes, I mean the ugly because there is a type of “love” that can make one to commit suicide or murder.

Yet, I know what type of love I am supposed to discuss in here. After the transition to glory of a spouse, can you give yourself permission to love again? I say a big yes. As mentioned earlier, I am love, and the love that I spring from is not conditional. It is not dependent on any man, situation, or circumstance. Otherwise, it’s not the LOVE of which I am made of.

If then I am made of love and it’s the source of all types of love whether the good or the perverted, to love again then should not be an issue. However, my fellowship with my Father is most important to me that to love again and be united with another man will depend on Him and His plan for me because I am mindful of my continual fellowship with Him.

While many have advised that I remarry, I have honestly not gotten any serious reasons to go ahead. I have also critically asked myself if I don’t have any carnal reason - pride or fear ? Yet, even I will advise anyone who asks me, to please proceed to remarry if that is the desire of his/her heart. God cannot overrule what we desire to do unless we give Him permission to.

 Personally, each time I take it to God, I always end up in awe of Him. For every question I ask and the reasons I shared with Him to remarry, He gives me an answer of peace and tranquility that makes me almost want to say, never. Some people may not understand and I don’t expect them to. Phil 4:7 “…peace of God, which passeth understanding…”.

In conclusion, to love again is not the issue as far as I am personally concerned. If in the course of my continual feasting in His presence, He says go, the next moment I will be remarried but if I continue to experience His love as I am currently doing and He gives me so much peace that earthly relationship cannot, then so be it. One thing is sure. I will never trade my fellowship with my Father for any earthly love.

Ibironke Olubamise is an intercessor/counsellor; an ordained pastor at Throneroom Trust Ministry and Secretary of the Women in God’s Prophetic Agenda, Nigeri. Ronke was married to Pastor Bankole Olubamise of blessed memory. They are blessed with two children.



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